Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Saturday, March 28, 2009
The real question, I think, is why write it at all? I suppose that this is my effort to keep Phil alive in some small way. His books and stories keep him alive in the minds of readers, and the movies are nice, but what about the man who wrote those stories? Others have written biographies and presented their theories, mostly about Phil's madness. They do not present the man that I knew, the man who shared his life with me for ten years. I want to show you the man, not my theories about him.
"I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to
death. They continue to participate in every act, thought and decision
we make. Their love leaves an indelible imprint in our memories. We
find comfort in knowing that our lives have been enriched by having
shared their love." ~~ Leo Buscaglia
Phil's body of work has left an indelible imprint on readers, and the time that he spent with me has left an indelible imprint on me. I hope to share that imprint with you.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
He used to ask everybody he met, including me, “Can toads talk?” I had a smart answer that frogs could talk, but toads could not. This question was actually a reference to the last line of the Carol King song “Tapestry”, which says, “and then he turned into a toad”. When Phil asked his psychiatrist whether toads could talk, Dr. Guido promptly noted in Phil’s chart that he was drunk. Phil was actually questioning whether animals have souls, or whether only humans have souls. If a man turned into a toad, would he still have a soul? Phil agreed with St. Francis of Assisi, who held that animals do have souls, and who used to go out into the woods and preach to the birds and the beasts.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Well, from the symptoms, which I will not describe in detail because some of them are disgusting, I am certain that he was suffering from a congenital gall bladder problem that our adult son also has. The diarrhea, the fatigue and other symptoms all cry out. And our son, just as his father did, suffered an acute attack of non-alcoholic pancreatitis. Phil always thought that his attack had been caused by drugs, but our son does not use drugs. In fact, he's a health nut and a licensed nutritionist.
After nearly dying, and then spending thousands of dollars on medical tests, Christopher learned that his gall bladder has a congenital defect, and that is why he suffers period bouts of "the flu". He is forced to send guests home, break appointments and lie in bed for two or three days at a time. Since he inherited this problem, and I do not seem to have it, he must have gotten it from his father.
So, Phil, I am very sorry for doubting that you really were ill.
~~ Tessa Dick
PS: My memoir, Firebright: Remembering Philip K. Dick will be available at Amazon dot com in a few weeks.
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